It would seem that we ourselves determine our fate – by decisions, a way of thinking, attitude to the world. But if the same plots are repeated in our life, most likely, our life scenario works so. And this scenario can create … Favorite children’s fairy tale. How fairy -tale plots and heroes can “enchant” us and force us to act according to a certain scheme, says psychologist Marina Melia.
My client has a small enterprise where about forty people work. But it would be more correct to say that the hostess works for them. She picks up the most helpless workers in professional terms, takes care of them, solves their problems, including personal.
This attitude almost led to a crash of business. It was at this moment that she turned to me for help. After listening to her story, I asked her unexpected question: “And what fairy tale did you love in childhood?”
It turned out that in childhood she adored Snow White and Seven Dwarfs “. Moreover, my client identified herself with the main character, who, in her perception, constantly took care of small and defenseless gnomes, not expecting any benefit for herself. The continuation of the fairy tale, where the gnomes save Snow White from the intrigues of the evil stepmother, she did not remember.
Here’s another example. At the dawn of perestroika, when no one yet knew about financial pyramids, I accidentally met in a cafe with one of the most famous authors of such a scam. Then he was still known to anyone. My colleague, a psychologist, including the development of the concepts of commercials, sat with him at the table. And during the conversation they asked me to come up with a creative for promoting a venture enterprise. I began to ask what they want, what kind of activity is assumed?
And the future “builder of the pyramid”, without going into the details, said: “I still have a book“ Buratino’s Adventures ”before my eyes, where there was such a picture: the cat Basilio and Fox Alice convinced Pinocchio on the miracle field in the country of fools”. At the same time, his eyes lit up, and he began to gambling to portray this picture in his faces. And then in life he organized this “field of miracles in the country of fools”, and people
suffered “buried” their money there.
Apparently, in childhood, they sympathized with Pinocchio, looking at the same pictures. I remembered this story only a few years later, when the pyramids managed not only to build, but also to collapse, and millions of people lost their money. And today we constantly hear such stories – about deceived equity holders and depositors.
Appeal to your favorite fairy tales is one of the options for scenario analysis. In childhood, we constantly re -read them, unconsciously identified ourselves with fairy -tale heroes, imagined themselves in their place and experienced the events of their fabulous life. Some of the fairy tales could make us such a strong impression (and not necessarily positive) that we determined our future, formed the basis of our life scenario.
How to find your scenario fairy tale?
When we ask an adult, what fairy tale he especially remembers, he is usually lost: “Yes, I do not know”. As a rule, to “make out” these blockages in memory, a special conversation is required. And the interlocutor suddenly clearly recalls that, as a child, he pestered his parents with requests to read the same fairy tale or put the same record.
But you can conduct this analysis independently, having determined repeated scenarios in different areas of our lives, finding what unites them and asking questions to itself. In the book “I want – I can – I need. Learn yourself and act!”(Eksmo, 2021) I give many real examples of how different fairy -tale scenarios in life are played out.
Looking at them, we can understand how it works for us. But just just remember your favorite fairy tale. When analyzing fairy tales, it is important to pay attention to three points.
